Fullfilling My Mommy Dreams

Hello All.

Things are going well with Steve out of work. He looks everyday and puts in his resume everywhere. If one has accidentally landed at your house I apologize...ha. He is trying to cover all his bases.

We had Family Game Night last night and that was fun. The boys love that simple stuff almost more than the bigger activities.

We have a new baby in our house. His name is Sullivan and I am in total and complete love with him. I feel like he is finally the dog I have always looked for. The other day someone said something HORRIBLY rude to us about our dog. Although my first instinct was to lash out and defend our actions, my husband told me to let it go. I had zero intentions of letting it go but the next day, I decided it was okay to do just that. But, with that said, I do want to explain about our dog in case other people wonder about why we would get a dog.

I am not a animal lover. I do not wish any harm on any animals and it does break my heart to hear of any animal abuse. I do not have a "heart" for animals that are on the side of the road wanting to rescue them etc. like my friend Kim does (she was a vet tech. for years). Animals just aren't my thing for the most part. We had dogs growing up and I always loved my dogs. I know my sister had a different relationship with them than I did but I did love them. My family cried for hours when one would die and I would feel very sad but got over it easier.

I always wanted a cocker spaniel so we got our dog Chesney 11 years ago. We got her from a breeder. For the first 8 years of her life Chesney got every shot she was supposed to get, she continues to be licensed every year, and she has never slept outside. She does go out early in the morning to our fenced in yard and she comes back in to go to bed at night. When it is very cold or very hot, we get her in the middle of the day or sooner out of the yard. She HATES to come in. She wants to be outside. We have to chase her to get her in if we try to do it mid day. This dog loves to be outside, to run in her yard. She is perfectly house broken and is not mean spirited or anything but is still as wild as the days when she was a puppy. The boys play with her almost everyday in the yard when it is nice out. She just chases them around the yard. She is terrible with other dogs and growls and lunges at them. She is not well behaved when it comes to staying with us, being around other dogs or sitting nicely as we watch TV. I was always disappointed that she was so wild and so unwilling to sit in my lap and let me just pet her. She loves us but is so independent and would rather play in her yard. If you say "you wanna go in your yard?"..she goes bananas. That is where she wants to be. She is groomed every summer due to getting matted easily. She is still taken to the vet if she has any medical issues. We do the heartworm and flea treatments. She has had very few problems since we have not allowed her to eat anything but her one kind of food after being warned of cocker's high chances of getting sick on food and getting fat and having health problems.

I would have loved to take Chesny places with us, take her to dog parks, put her on our Christmas card, let her run the house etc. but SHE wasn't that kind of dog. That is not my fault. We didn't buy Chesney and then put her on the streets or let her rot. She sleeps in our room every single night and has never slept anywhere else other than a trip to Steve's parent's house once. She is still very healthy as far as we know.

People have heard me say, many many times that I would never get another dog. I really believed I wouldn't ever go down that road again. Chesney's just not loving enough for me. I wanted a lap dog and she is not. She still chews every single thing in sight. So, I had no interest in getting another dog. I would say all the time that when she died, we would not replace her. All the dog lovers gasped at the fact I would speak of her death. I joked about it which I guess gave the indication that I disliked my dog. That is just not the case. Chesney got out a few months ago and I took 6 kids around the block in a stroller looking for her in tears. I want no harm to her. I groom her every year at least once and I kiss her everyday when I let her out. We have in no way mistreated this dog, let alone not take care of her.

So, I have been struggling lately with my kids getting bigger. Sawyer is my only little guy left and he is now 4. He is held way too much and told he is our baby all the time. I started thinking that it would be so great for him to have a puppy to raise. Samuel is at school but he could take the dog out on a leash everyday etc. He has always been so into Cheryl's dogs. He lights up when he plays with them. I started thinking that if we ever got him a dog, it would have to be a dog that I loved since we all know who ultimately takes care of the dog..mommy. I decided that if the dog was small and stayed small, she (we wanted a girl) would be easier to care for with our lives. I wanted to buy the dog purse and dress her up in doggie dresses. She would be my new baby. I knew I wanted to do things better this time. I wanted to socialize her, take her to dog parks and take her to training or train her ourselves. She would be a total part of our family.

I was willing to spend my Christmas money from my in laws on the right dog. We researched for about 9 days before buying him. We wanted a designer breed puppy which simply means that they are bred to be small, usually non-shedding, great with children and hypoallergenic. There is usually poodle in them because apparently poodles are amazing dogs. People just aren't crazy about their look. Although we do not have allergies of any kind, I do run a daycare so I had to think of that. I had no intentions of having the new dog around the children just as Cheney is not either. We wanted a yorkie poo but had trouble finding the right one. I am not a fan of an all black dog and the ones we saw for sale were all black. I wanted to make sure it was as close as possible to what I wanted in a dog so that I would be as attached as the boys. I was hoping the loss of my babies being needy babies could be transferred to a needy puppy.

We started at shelters to make sure we couldn't find a great dog there. There were great dogs but they were all very large. We will most likely be getting a golden retriever once Sullivan is older, Chesney has died (gasp) and I am done doing home daycare. We have always loved Cheryl's dogs especially Kelsey who died a few years back. She is still my favorite dog of all time. I loved laying with her and she loved me. Our yard is perfect for a big dog.

We didn't want to buy from a pet store for all the bad reasons we all hear. Finally, we found a guy who breeds all designer pups and Shih zhus and sells them in Liberty Twp. We were able to go to his store where he takes the puppies. They all come from his ranch so there are no puppy mills. He was great about answering questions and seemed to be very knowledgeable on each breed. He also gives a 5 day money back guarantee, 10 days on some specific problems and a year guarantee on organs. So, we felt better. He was very expensive but I just wanted the right darn dog. We were there forever picking him out. We played with so many puppies. Once we held Sullivan, I was a goner. Samuel was too. The man was dead set against us buying him because he would only get to 8 pounds at the most. Since then, our vet told us, he won't get past 4 or 5 pounds probably. He is only 2.8 now. So, we put him back and decided to leave and keep looking. My eyes filled with tears and I had a hard time leaving him. I started to go but looked at Samuel and he was crying. He kept saying he was sorry but he couldn't stop. He said "Mommy, I will never see any good in any other dog". So, after an hour of this, Steve said "go get your malti-poo". We got him out again and once again, we loved him. He was super super calm and just laid with us. It never occurred to me that he could be too calm...until later.

We left and went straight to Aunt Kim's to be checked since the vets were all closed. She checked him over and thought he looked good. She wasn't thrilled with how little he was either and wanted us to get something a bit bigger. I just knew I could handle his size. I appreciated her honesty though. So, we brought him home, put him on the ground and he didn't move. He never moved unless we carried him. We took him to see Steve's parents and he just slept on whomever held him. We were getting a bit worried..was he too calm? Sick?

Saturday night, we put him into his tiny carrier for bed thinking we may have a long night. He slept that night and every night since at least 9 hours without a peep. I laid awake thinking we had gotten a sick or really lazy, boring dog.

Sunday morning, we pulled him out of the kennel and he came alive. He chased the kids and ate for the first time. We set all the rules for running around him since his bones can break easily. We all stay put while he runs. The kids can run in front of him but when he catches up they stand still. It is a hoot to watch. We took him to PetSmart to buy a sweater. It is too big but it is the smallest they make, at least there. Today, Steve found a toy breed collar and it actually fits him.

He could not be more perfect now. I still can't believe it. I love him like he is a part of my family. I do to him what I did when my kids were babies, I wake him up to hold him because I miss him.

He plays all day in an open pack-n-play right in our dining room. He doesn't get lonely in there at all because there are 6 kids running past him all day. He hasn't had a single accident in the house since Monday morning. The boys take him out, look at the ground to ignore him, he squats pees, usually poops and jumps on their feet to pick him up. It has to be too good to be true. He is FLIPPIN perfect! Well, there is one thing. We were all laying on the floor last night and he bit my face lightly (but it hurt) like 10 times. I finally swatted his butt and he stopped.

Sawyer is allowed to play with him as much as he wants during the day. He plays with him 4-5 times while the daycare kids are here. He goes in the playroom and I put up a gate. I usually say when time is up when I see Sullivan has had enough. He starts looking tired. I had a feeling this would be great for Sawyer and so far it is.

So, that is the story. I really feel I made the right choice. Chesney has no idea he is here. She comes to bed and then I put Sullivan to bed in his crate. She wouldn't be happy if she knew!

I will take any and all advice since I am not the smartest dog owner in the world. Feel free to give me any tips...especially about tiny breeds.

Now, that is a long post!!!!!!!!!!